24 Tishri 5782
In memory of my dear Leesa, my wife, devoted mother to our beloved children, a fantastic Savta to our grandchildren, a deeply devoted daughter to her mother, Julie, and a devoted sister to Barry, Mark, Winnie and their spouses.
Well, here we are. We have made it through a particularly long and difficult year for all who are standing here and those who are listening and reading this. We’ve come to honor Leesa’s memory. It goes without saying that this year has been extremely difficult not just for us who mourn her and miss her. Our community and our nation have been through more than a year of awfulness that we all hope is now behind us even if its effects will be with us for long in the future.
We have just finished the fall holidays with Shmini Atzeret, the eighth day of assembly which immediately follows Sukkot. Sukkot is characterized by its universality—the nations of the world are invited to come to Jerusalem and join in our celebration. And then, we have Shmini Atzeret. We are told that the basis for this holiday is that G-d, having been shown the proper respect, admiration and love of His people and of the entire world, turns to B’nei Yisrael, his people, after the international guests have left and says: “Stay with me one more day, your departing from me is very difficult, stay with me”…
Oy, how many times have we here had that thought this year, about Leesa, with the exact same motivation, and perhaps in those same words..”your departing from us has been so hard on us”.
We have, thank G-d, gotten through this year, with thanks to the inner strength that she taught us by example during these last years, often in very difficult circumstances. And beyond that inner strength, and the mutual support that we have been able to give and receive within our family, both the immediate family and our wider family and many friends, Leesa always, but always demonstrated remarkable strength of character and physical fortitude and logical thinking and caring that fashioned and changed us all.
“Your departing from us has been so hard on us”. We sorely miss your warm smile, your well said “good word”, your ability to think outside the box, your love of our family and of family life itself, your deep, deep affection and love for your friends and colleagues, and your love of life itself.
“Your departing from us has been so hard on us”. When we wanted to talk to you about “things”, about what happened during the day or during the week to us, and to hear your insights, always “right on”, about any subject.
“Your departing from us has been so hard on us” when we celebrated the holidays. We miss your feverish but so well planned preparations for the various holidays, and the family traditions which you upheld or introduced; your take charge attitude for family affairs, your enthusiasm for involving women in our community in aspects of religious activity in keeping with Halakha, even if some “sacred cows” were put out to pasture. We saw the fruits of your decades of devotion to this aim three days ago at Simchat Torah celebrations in our community.
You were full of the joy of life, and it is so characteristic of you that your favorite book of the Bible was Ecclesiastes, Kohelet. The cynicism and astute but sometimes acerbic observations Kohelet has on the human condition she found realistic and relevant. And also, despite the cynicism, and his deploring the sadness of our aging and ultimately resigning himself to mortality, he commanded us to be happy in our lives—true happiness.
And for all these reasons, we here and everyone of us who feels Leesa’s absence, we all thank her for what she gave to us all in her life and thank ha-Shem for having been a part, a very great part of our lives, giving us good and happy years together, living and rejoicing with her in life and our family, learning from her and learning from her how to strengthen ourselves and each other, in order that we, all of us can continue in our lives, loving those dear to us, raising our children, and serving ha-Shem with gladness.
May her memory be bound up with the everlasting bonds of life and in our hearts for all our lives.
M. Goren